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Fahrenheit Four fifty-thismoviewasgarbage-one – Fahrenheit 451 (2018)

I recently watched HBO’s Fahrenheit 451. Yes, really. I did.

My favorite part of this film was the mechanical hound so constantly mentioned in the book. What’s that? There is no mechanical hound in the film? But isn’t that like the best part of the book?

Ok, ok… My second favorite part was the fact that Guy (main character) had a wife, like in the book, and the conflict that comes with that. What’s that? Guy doesn’t have a wife in this film? “But doesn’t, like, 50% of the conflict come from the relationship between Guy and his wife?” you say. Ahhh, but who needs deep character conflict when you have flashy lights, and cool lighting, and… uh… other things. Did I mention lights?

The fact that this movie bears the same name as the great original novel by Ray Bradbury is a disgrace to the toilets Ray took a dump in during his life.

The fact that this movie is still on HBO’s website is proof enough that nobody at HBO has ever seen a film before.

Shall I continue?

The budget was clearly massive on this thing, which makes the failure that much more epic.

Can somebody please tell me how a full-scale movie with a massive budget can’t find a good actor to play it’s 7th most important role. I know it’s the 7th most important, but you really couldn’t find 7 good actors?!

I’m talking, of course about this lady:

Photo by Jimi Celeste/Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

Khandi Alexander. How did nobody realize the garbage acting that this lady was producing? Somebody had to have watched her scenes and said “Yeah, that looks good.” That person should never work again.

I honestly don’t understand how nobody caught this. Either they’re blind, or they just realized the absolute scum the movie was and stopped caring.

But I’m going to stop, because I don’t want to ruin Khandi Alexander’s career. Although, in reality, it should be ruined.

But her acting didn’t ruin the movie. It was already garbage.

One thought on “Fahrenheit Four fifty-thismoviewasgarbage-one – Fahrenheit 451 (2018)

Add yours

  1. You are truly an incredibly genuine man, who is trying to get what we deserve, THE TRUTH. All these websites out there are saying they are “fair” critics, BUT DONT BE DECEIVED, they are getting paid off to put down good reviews. But just by reading the way you write, i know this is truth honor and wisdom and am excited to announce that this is my source of movie critics from here on out! Thanks Arm

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